security tower 3 event notebook second excerpt

12-6am

Zombie sighted sited showed up about 3:30. No worries. I killed it. WITH AN ARROW. Oh yeah. Who’s yo daddy?

I totally OWN that zombie. We should totally just use bows like aaallll the time. I wonder if there are like villages out there of like the crow or the eskimos all living in peace with nature and using bows and stuff. These things are awesome. All quiet and sneaking.  BOW TO ME. FOR I AM KILLS WITH BOW.





6-noon

Ok Kills with bow. You big chief. But you still need to clean the bathroom.

Just one? Were there more? Man I haven’t seen a Z-man in months. Was it all rotten and gross? I remember how about year 3 there were tons of those half rotten ones around. The smell was horrible. I still think I can smell it in my hair when I haven’t washed my hair in a couple of days.

noon-6pm

Man. Someone needs to clean up the Z-man (awesome name. I am stealing it). He  she it is really starting to smeeeeeeeell. Or at least dump some bleach on it.

 And why are all the arrows gone?





1800hours-0000hours

Reminder to all personel: Encounters with the re-animated dead must be reported using Form A-46 and the corpse must be properly disposed of by the individual responsible for the termination. And stop using this notebook for private conversations.





midnight-6am

Thank you. I think Z-man is more interesting then zombie and less thesoreathusly then “re-animated dead”.



Any one volunteering for the raiding party next week? I need some stuff. Pretty please.

One nice thing about this rain, its washing a lot of the smell away. Seriously. Some one needs to deal with that blimp. Its all puffed up. So Gross.





6am-12

Hehehe. I said I killed it with AN arrow. Never said which one. I think all but the last was defective.

Also I am signed up for the raiding party. Whatcha need? Make a list. Check it twice.

(what the hell is thesoreathusly?)



1200 hours-1800hours

I will not tell you this again. You need to clean that mess up. It’s a sanitation issue. And you need to replenish the arrows. Don’t make me write you up.

6pm-mid

Dude. He’s right. This shit is gag worthy. Someone needs to clean that up. NOT IT.

If you see any hoodies, I need a new one. And of course will totally trade sexual favors for an whiskey or vodka or anything like that. Real. Will do ANNNYYY thing.





12-6am

Ca’pin’s log. Shtar Date 5489254556538. The cru sheme restless. The dark of night bringsh little peace to dem. Dey shcwable over de responsibilities an shnap at each other o’er shupplies. I fear der spirits ah bre’ckin.



Oh and NOT IT. And keep your sexual favors to yourself.





6-noon

What the hell is that?



I need:

Tennis shoes. Size 7. Something bright like pink or blue. NOT GREEN. Sick of the ones they issue at the supply tent. So ugly.

If you can find them. Dress shoes. Same size. Something with a slight heel. No giant bows please.

Also nail polish. You know what I like there.

Lace. Something pretty. Not black. Prefer something soft. About 2 inches wide.

1 inch wide non-roll elastic. At least 40 inches

blue satin. At least three yards.

Matching blue thread

A pair of gardening gloves. Size small. (why the hell can’t the supply keep some on hand. We need small gloves too you know. Geez)

And if you just happen to see some, flower seeds. Don’t care what kind.



And ditto. Not it.





1200-1800

CAN’T YOU PEOPLE FOLLOW SIMPLE RULES?!?! If you kill it, you clean it.

But fine. I will clean it up. Replenish any supplies or weapons that are low at the end of your shift. Is this all really so much to ask.

And the exchange of sexual favors for anything is strictly forbidden. If I see it again I WILL report you. The same goes for the possession of restricted alcoholic beverages.

6-mid

That was my Scottish captain. Have list, will raid. See you all on the return.  Don’t worry captain, my captain, I will bring you a new stick to shove up your (paper torn through from heavy scribbling)

12-6am

That is the worst Scottish captain I have ever read. Hmmm Come to think of it, I think that is the ONLY Scottish captain I have ever read. Hmmm Can’t think of any I have even ever heard of. They were all really American. Except that English dude.

Oh looks like someone has a hot date. Hubba Hubba. Who’s the lucky laddie?

0600-1200

Hi I am Jean. I am filling in here while the raiding party is out.

Report for shift.

No Contact made with living people

No contact made with re-animated people

Saw elk at 11:30

Replenished arrow supply

Noted that toilet paper supply is low

Repaired bug net

This is the first time I have been assigned to a lookout tower so please let me know I am messing up.

Noon-6pm

Oh Hi Jean. Welcome to 3.  Don’t worry about the net. It doesn’t keep them out anyways and just makes it hot and hard to see at night.  And don’t mind Bob (the elk) he comes by every day looking for food. We found him years ago when we first set up out here and started feeding him. But we have him on a diet. Don’t worry. As long as you listen to us you’ll be fine.

And yes. I do have a date and no its not you :P

And what are you talking about? What captains? Some days I think you aren’t even human. Most days in fact.

1800-0000

Welcome Jean. Please be aware that this notebook is for work related information only. Please keep personal conversations out of it.

12-6am

Oh Burn. That’s harsh. You have crushed my dreams of twuw wove. As for the captains, you just won’t understand.

Wait. Bob’s on a diet? Since when? That explains why he is so hungry when he comes by on my shift.

We’re out of TP again.

Doo be doobe dooooo. Beware the penguins.

0600-1200

I REMEMBER THAT. That was from a beer commercial. Wasn’t it? 

Filled up the TP supply. No contacts of any kind. Not even Bob. Why Bob anyways? This coffee is terrible.

Noon-6pm

Don’t drink that coffee. It’s so old I don’t think it counts as coffee any more.

Has anyone heard anything about the raiding party? I thought it was supposed to be a quick trip.

I can’t remember where Bob came from as a name.

1800-0000

Don’t feed that animal. Don’t drink that coffee. In fact throw it out.

Mid-6am

Piss off.

Haven’t heard anything. I am going by supply later today. Will ask.

0600-1200

I am sure they are fine. Most of them are experienced rangers and it’s not like we have had many Re-animated showing up recently.

Noon-6pm

Any news?  What about the radios?

1800-0000

No personal conversations. If you have something to say that is not tower related say it when you are off duty and don’t put it here.

Mid-6am

Supplies told me something is up. Supposedly there has been no radio contact.

0600-1200

It’s only been a couple of days.  They may just be having issues from all the rain we have been getting. That could be messing with the signal too.

Noon-6 pm

(no entry other than date)

1800-0000

Bathroom is clean now.

Mid-6am

Anyone heard  anything?